Big dreams, big anxiety?

Well, once again, I’ve been experiencing this mix of great excitement and excrutiating fear. I mean, it’s a great feeling because it moves people and I guess it means that I’m doing the right thing. I’ve heard it said that if your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough. Mine keep getting bigger and bigger and I’m not sure how much more of this (good) fear I can handle.

This time though, my fear isn’t so much about PR. It’s about grad school. I’ve decided to pursue a new media journalism degree from Full Sail University. I’m only a few clicks and a fax away from starting classes on Monday. I am rather excited about it all while feeling apprehension. What if my work is not as good as other students? What if I cannot keep up with the material? What if I come across something completely foreign and cannot figure it out?

So many questions, so little time.

This is the part where I have to jump head first into my decisions and try to make the best of everything, learning useful leasons along the way that I will look back on, fondly remembering when I thought I would not be able to overcome. Yeah, that’s great.

Today, I had to go to my undergrad campus for my transcripts and ran into my computer professor. He was sitting in the library, misplaced due to the construction going on around his office. We chatted for a little until he stopped, looked me in the eyes and told me that there were many people he’d spoken to and that they are proud of me for graduating despite all of the obstacles. I certainly had some overcoming to do and, by God’s grace, I did it.

And I’ll do it again and again.

I doubt he knew that this was something I needed to hear today more than most other days. While my dreams scare me and there are a few hurdles to jump in order to make it, I’ve done it before and it can be done again.

There are people silently watching and cheering me on.

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2 thoughts on “Big dreams, big anxiety?

  1. I’m sure you’ll be fine. This is actually a lot like how I felt starting school again, but it’s definitely a worthwhile commitment. I like that you’re doing “new media” too. That intrigues me. I’ll be praying for you, of course.

    • Thanks, Casey. It just seems to be happening a little faster than planned. I know it’s just school again and I should really look at it that way: I’ll be learning! That’s awesome. I’ll definitely keep you posted.

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